Friday, February 11, 2011

What's a Nice Guy To Do?


Posted by Humphrey Brown
for the Domestic Diva Mysteries
by Krista Davis



Hi. I'm Humphrey. You may not be aware of this, but I wasn't supposed to be a recurring character in the Domestic Diva Mysteries. That's a little bit insulting, isn't it? The thing is that I'm a bit of a nerd. I make Sheldon Cooper of The Big Bang Theory look macho. There, I've said it and put it on the Internet for everyone to see. I -- am -- a -- nerd.

When I was in grade school, I had a whopper of a crush on Sophie. I used to ride by her house on my bike after school in the hope I might get a glimpse of her. She says she knew that I existed, but I'm not altogether sure of that.

Of course, that means I went to school with Natasha, too. Who thought she'd ever end up being famous? Actually, I guess she thought that. I know she ignored me. She still does.

That's my problem. Women see right through me like I'm not there. I wouldn't mind if Sophie broke up with Wolf, but she insists that's not going to happen. For a while, in The Diva Takes the Cake, I thought Sophie's sister might go for me, but she married Craig. Then I fell head over heels for a sexy policewoman in The Diva Paints the Town -- that ended very badly.

They say nice guys finish last, and I fear that's me. What's a nice guy to do? All I want is to meet a woman, but they run from me. So here we are again, with Valentine's Day looming. Everywhere I go there are chocolates and big hearts and flowers, and my plans for Valentine's Day are to go home alone, build a fire alone and eat a microwaved dinner -- alone. Anybody know a woman who would like a nice mortician?


Humphrey Brown wormed his way into Krista Davis's heart and became a regular in The Domestic Diva Mysteries. Krista continues to search for an appropriate love interest for Humphrey, but he always picks the wrong woman when she's not looking. Read more about The Domestic Diva Mysteries at divamysteries.com and sign-up for the newsletter. Barring unforeseen events of must-know-now magnitude, Krista promises not to send the newsletter more than four times a year. If you're hungry, stop by Mystery Lover's Kitchen where mystery writers cook up crime . . . and recipes!

14 comments:

  1. Oh wow, a lot working against you, Humphrey! Nothing wrong with nice guys, morticians, or nerds, though--I'm sure the right woman is out there waiting for you!

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  2. Aw, poor Humphrey! Keep the faith...and keep sticking around the Diva books. Your time is sure to come.

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  3. Hang in there, Humphrey... maybe a nice lady make-up artiste for the dearly departed will make her way into your life????

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  4. Humphrey, I think you really add a certain something to the Diva series. I know that it's just a matter of time until things really work out for you. Hang in there - we're always glad to see you.

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  5. Maybe if you rode your bike more and used the hearse only for its intended purpose . . .

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  6. Surely in these dire financial times, some smart woman will realize that your profession is particularly secure? We have to figure out how to turn you "downs" into "ups."

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  7. Oh, Humphrey - I am always cheering for you, and I know some great lady will notice your charm soon. Nerds are the new cool kids, you know.

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  8. Elizabeth, you seem very nice and cute, too. Oh, Krista's telling me you're married.

    Erika, I think Krista is jealous and doesn't want me to meet a nice woman. I mean, really, couldn't she write a nice woman into a plot for me?

    Victoria, I've tried with the ladies at work. They make jokes about the dearly departed being more interesting and having more color in their skin than me.

    Mary Jane, it's always nice to see you, too! Hey, how about your Charlotte?

    Janet, I've never thought of that. Do you think my hearse turns women off?

    Wendy, are you single? You're obviously very smart. I am lucky to be in a recession proof industry!

    ~ Humphrey
    Domestic Diva Mysteries

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  9. Julie, you give me hope! Nerds are cool? Maybe my day is coming. Would you poke Krista and tell her to be nice to me?

    ~ Humphrey
    Domestic Diva Mysteries

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  10. Humphrey, when you're not looking, the right woman will enter your life. Hang in there.

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  11. Humphrey you seem like a pretty cool guy to me. If you haven't had much luck in the romance department yet it is just a matter of time so get yourself all gussied up! Miss Right is just around the corner! ; )
    Glenda Stice

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  12. Thanks, Dru. I'm not looking. Okay, I'm pretending I'm not looking . . .

    Glenda, I'm a fairly tidy fellow, but I'm not the muscular health club type. I'll take comfort in knowing you and Dru think I will meet someone special. I'm hoping!

    ~ Humphrey Brown
    Domestic Diva Mysteries

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  13. Humphrey, I know...just know...that the right girl is due for you. Soon. Be patient. You want love to last a lifetime so don't rush things.

    ~Avery

    AveryAames.com
    @AveryAames
    facebook

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  14. Humphrey it's very nice to meet you! You seem like a sweet guy! I know it's hard to be alone, especially on the one day of the year that points out how single you are--trust me, I've been there most of my adult life. But if there's one thing I've learned over the years, it's much better to wait for the right person to come along than to be with someone who'll surely end up breaking your heart.

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