Tuesday, January 31, 2012

She’s Not the Boss of Me!


Hamlet the Cat from DOUBLE BOOKED FOR DEATH, the first in the Black Cat Bookshop Mystery series by Ali Brandon


Meow! I am Hamlet, the VIC (Very Important Cat) of Pettistone’s Fine Books. Some people call me the store mascot, but they don’t know any better. I’m actually the one who supervises everything while the store employees do what you humans call the grunt work (we cats call it the mouse work). For some strange reason, though, my new human caretaker, Darla Pettistone, thinks she’s in charge. That’s just because she inherited the store and building from my old caretaker, who was her great-aunt.

Well, the store and building might be Darla’s, but
she’s not the boss of me! Now that you understand that, let’s get down to business. If you read my book, you might already know about my life at the bookstore these days, but here’s what you humans readers call the back story.

I was born ten years ago in an alley in Brooklyn. My mother was a beautiful Siamese. I never met my father, but Mama told me he was a handsome black cat just like me. Unfortunately, the people who were my mother’s caretakers weren’t very good humans. They tossed Mama into the street right before my two brothers and I were born. Growl! And because Mama wa
s a house cat, she didn’t know how to hunt or hide or do anything a proper street cat can do.

Now, don’t start mewling. You humans are so sentimental. Hiss! I’ll have you k
now that everything worked out fine. Mama might have been as scared as a mouse, but she pretended to be a tiger and managed to take care of us boys. Just about the time our eyes were finally open, someone from what you humans call “rescue” found us in the alley. I overheard them say they were going to take us to a place called “foster” and then find inside homes for all of us.

Mama was happy—all she ever wanted to do was sit in some human’s lap—but I had already decided that I’d rather be on my own. So while the rescue people went to get a cage to put us in, I gave Mama and my brothers a lick good-bye. Then I ran and hid so they wouldn’t take me, too.

I spent the next few days alone in the alley. I found food in the garbage cans, but it wasn’t as nice as milk. I even ate a mouse, but it was all bony. And sleeping behind trash got my fur dirty, which meant I needed at least one bath an hour to maintain my looks. So I decided that living in an alley was not for a classy feline like me, after all. But by then it was too late to follow Mama to foster, so I decided to pick my own human from someone in the neighborhood.


Since it’s almost time for my next nap, I’ll have to tell you later about all my adventures before I found the right caretaker. But I finally chose the old female named Dee who had a store filled with th
ose big flat things you humans call books. It turned out that people who hunt books usually are quiet, which I liked. It meant that my naps wouldn’t be disturbed. And the books are kept on tall wooden stacks which are perfect for climbing on. And best of all, Dee understood cat language, so we got along just fine.

Yawn!
What, you’re still here? All right, to make you go away, I guess I have to bribe you like a mouse. And so I--okay, Ali Brandon--will give away a copy of DOUBLE BOOKED FOR DEATH to one of you humans who writes a comment to me here on this blog. But don’t wait too long to post. You’ve only got a week before the drawing. Now let me sleep! Hiss!


(The draw is open to U.S. and Canadian readers.)

DIANE A.S. STUCKART is the national bestselling author (writing as Ali Brandon) of DOUBLE BOOKED FOR DEATH, the first in her new Black Cat Bookshop mystery series from Berkley Prime Crime. She’s also the author of the popular Leonardo da Vinci mysteries, which have received starred reviews from Publishers Weekly and Library Journal, as well as a Florida Book Award Silver medal. Writing as Alexa Smart and Anna Gerard, she published several critically-acclaimed historical romances from Pinnacle Books. A native Texan with a degree in Journalism from the University of Oklahoma, Diane now lives in South Florida. Visit her at www.dianestuckart.com or www.alibrandon.com .

22 comments:

  1. Sounds like a good life you have there Hamlet. Your humans are lucky you chose them to live with.

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  2. I know what you mean. I'm a cat, too, and I'm not Tell a Yarn's mascot. I keep track of everything. People who hunt yarn aren't as quiet as people who hunt books. You should hear the shrieks when a new shipment comes in! But they pay me homage--all the hand-knit catnip mice I could ever want.

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  3. Yes, Sue, my humans are lucky to be my humans! MOL (meow out loud!) to Lucy on the yarn. Maybe you will send a nice ball of it to Hamlet in care of Pettistone's Fine Books. Sincerely, Hamlet VIC

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  4. Welcome, Hamlet...and Ali! So nice to have you join us and so glad you found such a great new home. You're a fine lucky guy, by the way!

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  5. Hamlet, I am so glad to meet you. Loved the book that was written about you. Can't wait for the next one to see what you're up to.

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  6. Thank you, Erika, for letting me drop in. Meow-rrmph! Kristin, you are obviously a highly intelligent human. You get the paw print of approval! ~Sincerely, Hamlet VIC

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  7. Nice! Very cool to have you here, Hamlet! Your story sounds like fun...can't wait to check it out.

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  8. How exciting! I think this is going to be a great story to read!

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  9. Hamlet, I'm so glad to see that a new cat has arrived on the book scene. I miss Koko and Yumyum from the Cat Who.. series so much since the author passed away. I'm looking forward to seeing you around the bookstore.
    suefarrell.farrell@gmail.com

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    1. KoKo and YumYum are some of my favorite cats. You will note that they don't talk human, either. They understand it, like me, but we all agree it's far more dignified to speak feline.

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  10. Nice to meet you Hamlet. You sound like a fun cat to get to know and I can't wait to hear more about you in this new book. Happy Napping!

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  11. I'm a sucker for cats, especially black cats. I am looking forward to reading the start of this new series. Thanks.

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    Replies
    1. You are correct, black cats are the best. Meow-rmmph!

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  12. Hi Hamlet, I have five cats just like you that I rescued. I love each of them. I am glad you found a nice quiet home. Thank you for the chance to win this book.

    griperang at embarqmail dot com

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    Replies
    1. You are a cat's favorite kind of human. Meow!!

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  13. Thank you, Kari and Mish and Breaunna. You get a whisker flick. Sincerely, Hamlet VIC

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  14. Hi Hamlet,

    Do you get along with Darla?

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    1. Don't tell her I said so, but Darla is OK for a human. Of course, she thinks I am a most marvelous cat. Purrrrr!

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  15. Hamlet, black cats are my favorite and your quick and decisive reactions to the humans you encountered was great fun to read

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  16. I like the name Hamlet. My black cat's name is Noche-(Night in Spanish_
    the book sounds really good.
    Joye
    JWIsley@aol.com

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    1. Joye, Noche is a very acceptable cat name. I'm sure he is a fine fellow. ~Hamlet

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  17. ME-OOOW! This is Hamlet the VIC. We have a winner in the drawing for a signed copy of DOUBLE BOOKED FOR DEATH. And the lucky human is: ANGELA. I'm sorry the rest of you didn't win, but maybe next time. A flick of the whiskers to everyone. Sincerely, Hamlet. PS...Ali Brandon says congratulations, too.

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