Saturday, December 22, 2012

All I Want for Christmas is a Crime Wave



by Ray Twombley 


I may look like a tough guy on the outside with my badge, my gun and extreme vigilance towards out of state speeders, but the truth of the matter is, I do have one real weakness. I have a soft spot the size of Santa’s gut for Christmas.  I love the tinsel, the smell of the tree, the colored lights that blink on and off. Come to think of it, Christmas lights with all their flashing might be what inspired me to become a cop in the first place. 

Christmas is always full of magic and surprises and this year I got the best one of all: a murder. Now I’m not saying I’m happy a nice lady like Beulah went and got herself killed. But really, at age ninety-three, how many good years could she have had left? Besides, until someone did her in we’d never had a murder in Winslow Falls before. It's pretty hard on a dedicated officer of the law, like myself,  for his most challenging case to involve the kidnapping of the Baby Jesus from the manger scene in the village square.   


But this year, Beulah's death was just the beginning of a crime wave so hot I don't know how we managed to end up with any snow. We were treated to a slew of thefts, break-ins and even a band illegal immigrants. And that doesn't even begin to address the criminal damage caused by our acting fire chief to the village's nicest display of outdoor holiday decor. All I can say is I hope the new year brings as much fun as this one did. Happy holidays to you all!

For the Have a Cozy Christmas Contest Jessie is giving away a copy of Live Free or Die to one commenter who shares an item from a Christmas list either in the present or from their childhood. 

49 comments:

  1. As a little kid, pre-Barbie, I wanted a ballerina doll. While cleaning out my mother's house this year after her death, my sister and I found the dolls. They are minus their feet. Moving their feet so much must have been too much for the plastic. We saved the dolls anyway.

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  2. I always wanted an Easy bake oven since I was a child. Never got one!! Now I'm an adult, I am still haunted by the absence of that little cooking device, even though I have a big grown up oven to use.

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  3. On my current Christmas list is a curry leaf plant. Unfortunately, they are terribly expensive.

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  4. Thanks for the nice post, I enjoyed reading it. On my Christmas list is a bigger wardrobe. I just need more space for everything.

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  5. Thanks for sharing with us and the only thing on my current list "is to lose weight!" or the stores need to make better women's clothing! Merry Christmas to you and all you love, hope you find lots of crime under the Xmas tree!
    Lynn/MI

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  6. A couple of years ago all I wanted was an IPad. My husband kept trying to think of other things to get me and I finally said, no, I don't want anything else. All I wanted was an IPad so don't waste money on other things. I got my IPad and I love it! I read most books on my IPad now and listen to Christmas music while I am at it.

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  7. A few years ago one of my Chanukah presents was the original series Star Trek pez dispenser.

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  8. Dianne-South DakotaDecember 22, 2012 at 7:59 AM

    Two Christmas gifts that stand out in my mind are the red rocking horse I received when I was about 4 or 5 yrs old. I still have it and it has stood the test of time by being used by my own daughters. There are pictures of me on it, in my parents' photo albums. In addition I got a fringed western jacket. It wasn't leather, probably some sort of plastic but the two items, received the same year stick in my memory as I was a big cowboy fan and enjoyed watching westerns on TV. By the way, I am female, so these are items that most people probably think would have been given to a boy.

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  9. When I was in high school I got one of the first graphing calculators for Christmas. I don't think I ever really figured out how to use it but I was the envy of all the nerdy guys in my classes and that made me popular in my circle of friends for a while!

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  10. I'm an elementary school librarian and I would love this red headed (to match me) librarian doll I saw on Pinterest. But it seems the only place you can buy it is in Japan.

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  11. I have lots of things I'd love to get, but my yearly wish is a jar or can of cashews, a favorite treat. Thanks to my daughter, I always get one.

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  12. As a child I received a jewelry box the was also a music box with a moving ballerina. And I also got a pearl ring to put inside! Still have the jewelry box. Happy Holidays. Thanks for having this contest.

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  13. When I was a little kid, I loved treasure trolls! I wanted one every time we went out and they were around. For Christmas, I asked Santa to bring me nothing but... and he brought me more than I ever imagined :) I never asked for another one after that, and I still have them to this day for my daughter to enjoy :)

    Marie
    songbird1613 at yahoo dot com

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  14. Growing up I wanted a cabbage patch kid. I got one then my sister cut the dolls hair off.

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  15. On my current list is fabric for quilting projects.

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  16. When I was young I wanted a pair of white boots.

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  17. I'm not sure if it was on my Christmas list, but one of my all time favorite Christmas presents was the Fisher Price Castle! This was no girly fairy castle, but one with a pet dragon! My favorite part was the trap door that sent people to the dungeon! I still have that castle almost 40 years later!

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  18. I would like to add to book collection that I have and complete series that I don't have the whole set such as The Haunted Bookstore series by Alice Kimberly.

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  19. When I was a kid all I wanted was the game Battleship and I still love playing it, but now with my kids. On my wishlist this year is a Keurig coffee maker. Instead of my slow Coffeemate pot that takes forever, coffee quickly first thing in the morning would be a dream :)

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  20. When I was about third or fourth grade, I wanted a yellow dress. I wanted that dress so bad, I wished on every chicken wishbone and first star, and I put it right on top of my Christmas list. Yes, sir, I was so used to dreaming of a yellow dress, that I completely forgot I'd just gotten one for my November birthday!

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  21. Books have always been on my Christmas list, past and present. This year, thanks to Facebook, my TBR list is amazing with so many cozy mysteries that I don't know where to start. kuzlin(at)aol(dot)com

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  22. Ice skates. All the kids skated in Duluth, MN back in the 40s and 50s - after school, evenings, weekends. We had 2 rinks within walking distance. Skates were found under the tree many times over the years.

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  23. On my Christmas list this year is the movie - The Other Boleyn girl and the book The Secret Diary of Anne Boleyn.

    Thank you for the chance to win

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    Replies
    1. I teach journaling, and was interested in finding fictional journals. I found The Secret Diary of Anne Boleyn. It's excellent.

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  24. I think I already got what I want for Christmas! My husband is home, not in the hospital (he was in and out for 2 months this year), he's been approved for his S.S. Disability so that burden of uncertainty is taken care of and from the looks and sounds of things, all of my family is going to have a wonderful Christmas and will probably get just about everything they want. We have been blessed, thank you Lord!

    wfnren(at)aol(dot)com

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  25. I bought myself a ring in Jerusalem while on tour there many years ago. Now I'd be happy with a gift of a poinsettia, a mystery book and an e-reader (I still love the feel of a book between my hands but also want to be comfortable with some new technology.

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  26. I always wanted a dog. Now that I'm grown-up, I got one.

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  27. I wanted a charm bracelet as a teenager. I got one and wore it to church. Then I got in trouble for making too much noise.
    Sandy 2012

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  28. In third grade I wanted a pink and white Schwinn two-wheeler that was in Doc's Firestone store. I went in one day and it had SOLD on it. Doc said some old bearded farmer-looking guy came in & bought it for his favorite girl. I was devestated. Doc still let me sit on it when ever we took Lunch to my dad. I was beyond the beyond Christmas morning when it was under the tree. The bearded farmer guy was Santa!!! When I was grown. I found out Doc himself gave it to me. :)

    Would love to read this book.

    Pen

    pmettert @ yahoo dot com

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  29. I have a bracelet with coins from all over - no charms.

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  30. How can I buy Live Free or Die? I'm sure the method is somewhere on this page, but I can't find it! Thanks.

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  31. i've always wanted a big book shelf and a room only for my books, still wishing till now :D

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  32. iPad

    bn100candg(at)hotmail(dot)com

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  33. I can remember receiving a train set one year. Pretty cool for a girl I thought.

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  34. The best present was my puppy. I had asked for one for a year and they surprised me at Xmas. When your a kid thats the greatest gift.

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  35. On my current christmas list, I would love a slow cooker or curtains. Back when I was younger, I loved collecting barbies :) so that was always on my list

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  36. After visiting Santa last week, my two year old now asks for the following when you say "what do you want Santa to bring you?" a candy cane

    caradube@bellsouth.net

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  37. When I was a kid, my barbie doll was my favorite all-time gift. My sister and I like horses alot, so we always liked the horse figures with saddles on that we could make the dolls ride. One pinto horse even had hooves that made a clacking sound when it was moved around!

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  38. One of my favorite present was a copy of THe CLue in the Locket by Nancy Drew. THis book started a love of books and of mysteries. I remember that the March before that CHristmas, my Mother and Daddy had adopted my brother. THe book was about a pair of adopted twins.

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  39. My current want list is book, fabric and yarn. LOL. Susan Fryman

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  40. i remember one of my WishList items when i was younger was a collared-button-down shirt!!! i thought it meant that i was a 'big girl'.....& yes, i received one that Christmas!!!!

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  41. My favorite Christmas wish list item was a gold heart chain, I received it from my grandfather on his last Christmas with us. 25 years later I still cherish it.
    inspiremichelle@yahoo.com

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  42. I have always had books on my wish list---ever since I can remember---and they can last for the whole year.
    suefarrell.farrell@gmail.com

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  43. Seems like as a child I always got a book to read, crayons and a coloring book. Thank goodness I did because now I am very creative and I love to read. Now I always ask for a particular book as a gift.

    JWIsley(at)aol(dot)com

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  44. One Christmas I wanted a doll named Cricket when I was little. I wanted her so BAD, my Mom & Dad got her for me and 20 some years later I still have her. This year she was in a Christmas picture with my two little girls (a peke & Shitzu). The pictures turned out really cute.

    MinDaf @ Aol.com

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