From: The White House Gardening Mysteries By Dorothy St. James
Ohh! I'm so angry I could spit. Why? Because of those power-grabbing gardeners have stolen my research, that's why!
Ever since the gardeners have been getting extra (albeit undeserved) attention, thanks to their nosy new assistant gardener, Casey Calhoun, and her lucky breaks at catching a few killers and saving the President and all, those gardeners think they deserve ALL the attention.
Anyone who knows anything about the White House understands that my job is much more important than theirs. I'm the keeper of the history. They sling dirt.
I'm sure you can appreciate my dismay when I was assigned to work with those mud-stained egomaniacs. But did I complain? No, I bit my tongue and dutifully held their incompetent hands as we worked on creating a detailed history of the White House gardens.
Did I get noticed for my sacrifice? Did I get a molecule of well-deserved attention?
Instead of thanking me for my hard work, the gardeners robbed me. They took my research notes. I'm sure they plan to claim those notes as their own and take credit for finding--
Oh, no. You almost tricked me. But I'm too smart for someone like you. You'll try to steal the credit, too. I can tell just by looking at you that you would do something underhanded like that. Your eyes are too close together. And they have a shifty look to them. You're as untrustworthy as the gardeners. You all are!
All I dare say is that while digging through the historic papers, I discovered a secret that had been overlooked for over 200 years! And the discovery will be mine! All mine! As soon as I can steal my research notes back from those deceitful gardeners.