Thursday, March 15, 2012

Ode to a Four-legged Friend

In the style of Dorothy Parker

O canine! Thou art wise.
Thou art true and blue.
Tho’ thy fur sheds on mine sleeve
and thou dost chew mine shoe.

Thine days are spent in slumber.
Thine nights, ye howl at la luna.
Yet why oh why did thee purloin
mine sandwich made of tuna?

Man’s closest friend, thou art.
Yet this woman loves thee more.
Free of mind, and true of heart.
But must ye piddle on the floor?

Never wilt thou win a trophy.
Never wilt thou make me rich.
But thou wilt always be beside me,
you shaggy, splendid son of a bitch.

MURDER YOUR DARLINGS, the first book in the Algonquin Round Table Mystery Series, has been nominated for an Agatha Award in the Historical category. Dorothy Parker returns in YOU MIGHT AS WELL DIE, now available. She also appears in the short story HAIR OF THE DOG: An Algonquin Round Table mini-Mystery, available on Kindle and Nook for only 99 cents.


  1. O woman wise and loving!
    You, whom we adore!
    Upon the floor we will not piddle
    If you grab our leashes and open that door.

  2. Very cute & funny. And not surprising. We'd like to point out that cats are litter-trained!

  3. With apologies to Mr. Joyce Kilmer:

    I think that I shall never see,
    A dog who doesn't like to pee...

  4. If you'll allow one comment more,
    Dogs clean all the crumbs left on the floor.

  5. Dogs do indeed clean the floor. And in defense of my fellow canines, in my house, it's the cats that purloin the tuna . . .

    ~ Daisy

  6. Wonderful! You just turned a glum morning around. Thanks!